im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
You are a genius and a whore.
Two words: nipple clamps
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