Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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