why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Randomize