i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
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