That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
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