She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
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