I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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