It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
