don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Randomize
