Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
