That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Fuck appropriateness.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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