I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
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