Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Sorry my hands just texted you
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
