google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
zippers are such a cool invention
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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