Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
