clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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