**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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