my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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