I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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