i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
