he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
