READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
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