i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
