maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
