actually, I'm a sock model
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
