There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Randomize
