i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
