Whats the glycemic index on semen?
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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