Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
