I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
