We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?