I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Randomize
