Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.