I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
