The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
this will be a night to untag.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
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