GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
