this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
