By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
