Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
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