Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
She bit a glass in half.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Randomize
