I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
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