I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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