i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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