Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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