I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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