I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Randomize
