I don't usually arrange sex via text message
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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