My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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