Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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