She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
