I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Is her dick bigger than yours?
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Randomize
