At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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